I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
