it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
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