$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
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