mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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