I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
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