Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize
