I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
