No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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