I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
