so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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