I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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