This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
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My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize