Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
