chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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