i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
EVERY baby cries during their baptism. It's like they know from that moment on their parents are going to make them do lame things like their first communion and stuff.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Randomize
