One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize
