Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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