that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
