The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
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