Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize