In the future we'll all be gay
My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cat food counts as protein by the way
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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