So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
