Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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