The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
