dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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