is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Randomize