I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
