U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
