people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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