whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize