This girl is more easily done than said...
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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