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• (415): View more from California

  And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"

  (1-415): View more from California

  What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.

  (415): View more from California

  He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford

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• (561): View more from Florida

  And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."

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• (316): View more from Kansas

  He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves

  (806): View more from Texas

  That's not technology. Doesn't count.

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• (641): View more from Iowa

  you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts

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• (662): View more from Mississippi

  I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now

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• (914): View more from New York

  Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.

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• (423): View more from Tennessee

  An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.

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• (954): View more from Florida

  He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub

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