So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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