My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
