Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
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