what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
We need to get me chipped asap
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
