it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
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