i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
organizing the empties. That sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
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