Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
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