i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
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