I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
being pregnant is like rehab
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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