Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
The power of my boobs compel you
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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