fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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