Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize
