It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
Randomize