I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
