I bet he comes in French.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
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