dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
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