so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
