Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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